When I first started blogging bloggers wrote about what’s going on in their day-to-day lives. It was more like having a journal that anyone could read. People weren’t writing for anyone but themselves really….but not in a selfish way either. Since then so much has changed and more and more people leans towards giving advice or sharing the best recipes and workouts. As anyone can see, I’ve written my fair share of information based posts so I can’t throw stones. I believe whether it’s old school or information based it all holds value. However, I blame the stalker in me (come on, everyone has an inner stalker….that’s why we love social media so much….we get to peek into other people’s live without being blatant) but I prefer old school blogging. This is probably why my site would be considered more of a ‘lifestyle blog’ than being part of a certain niche.
About a year or so ago I noticed Lynne of LGSmash “Currently….” posts. She writes them on a monthly basis and it’s a mix of old school blogging and allows us to catch up on her life within moments. I loved it so much that I actually did my own “Currently…” post once. It was quick, easy, and allowed me to write about stuff that didn’t really call for an entire blog post. Why I didn’t keep up with it? I have no idea. Then this past week I read “The Truth Is…” post from Katie of Run This Amazing Day. It’s somewhat the same idea of “Currently….” but a bit more of a confessional. It struck a cord. At this moment in time I have a lot of stuff going on. (who doesn’t?!) While I haven’t been keeping secrets I also haven’t written about some things that are happening in my world. This is mostly because they have no effect on anyone but me. But, because they do consume much of my thoughts anytime I sit down to write it’s almost as though I have a mental block. Kind of like avoiding the elephant in the room.
So, bear with me as I go a little old school….
The truth is…while I’m not scared for my upcoming ultra I have to admit I do have some concerns. Sure, things are going as planned when it comes to the training I’m getting in, but is it enough? Although I don’t rely too much on what the ‘experts’ say, but more on what my body does, I do have to say this article at least gave me some reassurance that I’m not totally crazy in my idea of less is more .
The truth is…my biggest concern is knowing I’m running this with my friend Heather. Wait, shouldn’t that provide comfort? It does. However, it’s no secret that I’m a loner when it comes to running. I rarely run with groups because of the anxiety it brings. Am I going too slow? (likely) Am I going too fast? (unlikely) In fact, when it comes to races, specifically on trails, I allow myself to fall back off of the ‘pack’ just so I can be alone. While being alone on the trails may give people some anxiety and heighten their fear, I appreciate the alone time, being in my own thoughts, taking in my surroundings. With all of the being said, let me be clear (because I know she’s reading this too)…I REALLY want to run the race with Heather and have full intentions om doing so. Not only because I want to tackle this feat together, but I know ultrarunning is a different animal and chances are I’m going to need someone out there. Her and I have discussed in great detail where we stand in our training and goals but I can’t seem to shake off the idea that I’m going to be able to keep up with her the entire time.
The truth is…with the recent current events in the world, specifically the US, I find myself saying, “I can’t….” and walking away from the turmoil it’s causing. I know if I close my eyes and turn my back it’s not going to go away but I’m at a loss as to what I should or shouldn’t do…or say. It’s not so much that I take issue that my beliefs don’t align with someone else, but the way people are going about expressing their thoughts. True, change doesn’t happen by itself and sometimes waves need to be created in order to make a change, but there are better ways of going about taking action than some have chosen. I’m also over the idea that whatever someone believes they take as fact. I am all for having conviction but it’s just as important to remove the blinders and see all of the facets, not just the one we believe to be true.
The truth is…after being off of birth control for 5 years I have decided to make an appointment with my doctor to discuss starting again. No, DH and I haven’t been trying to have a baby for 5 years as each of us have had the appropriate procedures performed to avoid that from happening. When I made the decision to stop BC my doctor actually encouraged me to stay on it to keep my endometriosis at bay, but at the time I had it in check and I wanted to try me best to reduce my exposure to unnecessary chemicals and such.
Over time my endometriosis has progressively worsened. The first year I stopped BC I’d go months without a cycle and had no idea when it’d hit. At this point I’m still not ‘regular’and my flow can last up to 2 weeks. The only way I know it’s coming is based on the cycle of pain which I experience approximately 3 out of 4 weeks each month. In addition, my discomfort is only increasing with intensity. After dealing with crippling cramps in my teens I have no desire to deal with this again. Couple the lack of regularity with increased discomfort and it can wreak havoc on any training or race plans. Trust me, it’s not pretty. (Hence, one more reason why I often wait until the week of to register for races).
To add insult to injury I’ve also gained a decent amount of weight since stopping as well. Of course there are a variety of factors that could have attributed to this but my history has shown that while most people gain weight when they get on birth control and lose when they get off it was the opposite for me. I’m not sure what the future holds when it comes to all of this but after a significant amount of internal debate over the past year, it’s time to step up and do something.
The truth is…DH has chosen to step away from pursuing a music career and I respect/support his decision. However, it’s not the end of the road for us and the music industry just yet. We’ve teamed up with some young local artists to provide guidance. Of course DH and I don’t know everything there is to know about the music industry but we’ve earned our stripes. Our goal is to provide direction so they can hopefully avoid mistakes that we’ve made in the past. While DH is focused on general management and some social media I have stepped in to assist as well with social media and building a brand new website for them. Essentially we’ve doubled our work load and any downtime I’ve had lately has been focused on their project, especially since I’ve had to stretch a new muscle as I build their site since it’s quite different than mind. I still have a long way to go but its awesome to see something take shape. While time consuming it is enjoyable and nice to have a project that we’re working on together.
So, what’s your “The truth is….”?
Keep Smiling and Be Grateful =)